The Matriarch Has Passed

TC and I wrote this blog together:

I don’t know how many of you folks know what a matriarch does in the animal kingdom. The definition in human form is: a woman who is the head of a family. When I reflect on this definition, I immediately think of a person who, for so many years was a big part of my life. A person who thought so much of her family and enjoyed them all every day. A person who marveled over her many grandchildren.

The bible eloquently says: To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

On Thanksgiving Day of this year, the Cyr family, and my wife Therese, TC, lost their matriarch and mother, Annette Cyr.

Now, Annette helped to raise ten children. TC was number six. Annette was proud of them all and I recall a number of times when this very soft spoken person, who could be very tough as well, would tell me so.

After the days of the loss, I reflected back upon my time with Annette from when I first met her until the Sunday before her passing, when I visited her for the last time. She was always very protective of her family, and I would see that at the onset of my relationship with her daughter. She really was not that pleased with a long haired young man driving a pickup truck coming to call on number six. Eventually, I won her over and was accepted into their home, albeit under her watchful eye. While TC’s Dad was working, or fishing or hunting, she would be home tending to the things that needed mending. See, she was very good with her hands and could fix just about anything. She was also very creative and artistic. She designed many beautiful mangers using paper mache and cedar. They came in many different shapes and sizes.  But her forte was oil painting magnificent sceneries, and her favorite scene was winter. I recall the last couple of years when she was living at home, where she undertook a project to paint a scene for each of her 16 grandchildren.

Annette was also a spiritual person, and a person that gave of her time to the church. For a period of time she helped to decorate the church with her own decorative banners. She was also a talented singer, and sang in the church choir and at many funerals.

I also recall, when she finally went into the assisted living home, where she would enjoy our visits with her. Later on, when I sported a full beard, she would walk up to me, grab onto the beard, and pull it a bit and then laugh. She also had a competitive streak in her. I recall a number of times when we would walk down the hall of the home she was in, and walking behind me with her walker. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, she would speed up and pass me and look back with a smile only she had.

Annette was bilingual, but her first language was French.  She would usually speak English when I or the grandchildren were around. But over the last several years she reverted back to full French. I remember one time when one of my sons was visiting her in the home, where out of the blue, she spoke English to him. We were so surprised by that.

Annette was also very particular with the clothes she wore. They had to be to her liking or they did not get worn. They also had to be a certain style and color. On one of our last visits with her, she was complaining about the pants she had on and at one point, I thought she was going to take them off right then and there. TC managed to comfort her and calm her down.

Another thing that comes to mind is that Annette was a master cook in the kitchen. Her meals were so delicious. The only problem was that most of her recipes were all in her head. She knew just how much to add and when to add it. Later on in life, she made it known that she was tired of cooking, one can only agree with her based upon ten mouths to feed at once. But even as she got older she would always have some food on the table whenever we stopped in. And whenever friends or family walked in unannounced, everyone was welcomed and she always greeted everyone with a warm heart, and a warm meal, and even a warm bed for those that came from afar.

Finally, I will always remember her for the person who would not really stick up for herself, except for this one time. She always loved to stop at our home and on a few occasions, let Rosaire, TC’s father know that she wanted to stay the night. This particular time, they were both sitting in the living room and true to form, Rosaire said something that she did not like. All of a sudden, she stood up in front of him and let him have it. I still hear the chorus of “You Shut up”. “You shut up, you! It was priceless. Rosaire just sat there and did not know what had hit him. I had to hold back the smile. I mastered that, and from time to time, in fun, would remind TC of that day using the same tone and words that she spoke on that day.

As we move on, and she would want that to happen, I will always remember her smile, open arms and love for all of us. She taught me and my sons a lot in her own quiet way.                

Mom, our wonderful memories of you will never fade. You were a loving, respectful, comforting and consoling woman. I am forever grateful for all that you have done. Your quiet nature and random acts of giving and sharing will always be cherished. Your duties as a wife, mother and friend were special indeed. But the one thing that I took notice of, was your faith and how it gave you the courage and strength to move on, especially during the difficult times. It was the same way with Dad. I realize now that my faith has grown from your seed, and it’s my hope that one-day people from everywhere can pass that on.   May the choirs of angels meet you at heaven’s gate and bring you in to where you belong.  Thank you and God Bless.